I was in Vienna last week thurs to this week mon eve. Three weeks prior to that, I started to draw and cut out roughly 850 organza butterflies. The material was among the three IKEA big bags full of costumes and fabric we bought off that hat factory in May, for 70 Euros alltogether. :)
If I bought it at a shop, I would have paid more just for the organza. I have a talent in finding stuff I need- which also goes for decoration, and clothes.
After I had cut them (alone, 4 hrs./day for three weeks), I cut the insides of the wings, and burnt the edges with my stencil cutter (no overlocking possible due to the shape of the butterflies). One suitcase full of butterflies. :) Knowing there is photoshop, and laser cutting, which would have delivered the same results in 2 rather than 80 plus hours, that one was a hard lesson in patience, once again. :D
Then I handed them over to Nelly, who did the hood- considering she is 3rd year, had'nt done any tailoring up to two and a half years ago and the costume is so specific there are no standard cuts available..she did PRETTY well. ;) Well- she IS talented, and bored at school, and always looking for interesting stuff to do on the side. That way, we are a perfect match. I call her "gothic cotton candy"- which is totally her style. :)
I told her about the upcoming psychologist's expertise/testimonial on my mental health, and she had a good laugh. Like most of my friends when they heard the story. She told me about the two teenage girls she looks after (a troublesome two), and that one of them suffers from manic depression (a disease many, including my father from age 4, have tried to linke me up to. Fancy thing to do by a person who has physically and mentally abused you, but that is another story..and a classic strategy to get rid of a "mistake" if you're a doctor.).
She then said that she couldn't and wouldn't let me sleep over for days if I had any of the signs of that disease..and she has known for quite some time now. :) Manic depression..substance abuse, self-mutilation, promiscuous sex. Try to find any of those in my blood, on my skin, and in my life.
Sorry, guys, but I guess you will have to keep on searching. All I AM is being tired, and seriously, seriously exhausted. And very angry from time to time- usually after I had managed to regain my energies a bit. Oh, and I talk a lot faster when I have had too much coffee (I am an HSP not watching my food intake properly...://). :D..Rainer von Leoprechting ( I did an Interview with him for this blog last year while I was homeless and had to do SOMETHING to stay busy and mentally sane) said when I had forwarded the link to the BDZ blogpost to him.."Well, it is a shame that this colleague obviously has no knowledge about trauma or the like..". Which says it all, really.
Good to know there are quite a lot of people now recognizing my talent, and my spirit these days. Which helps. Here are the butterflies, and a snapshot of the suit as it is now- I am still struggling with the stencil cutouts. :)
If I bought it at a shop, I would have paid more just for the organza. I have a talent in finding stuff I need- which also goes for decoration, and clothes.
After I had cut them (alone, 4 hrs./day for three weeks), I cut the insides of the wings, and burnt the edges with my stencil cutter (no overlocking possible due to the shape of the butterflies). One suitcase full of butterflies. :) Knowing there is photoshop, and laser cutting, which would have delivered the same results in 2 rather than 80 plus hours, that one was a hard lesson in patience, once again. :D
Then I handed them over to Nelly, who did the hood- considering she is 3rd year, had'nt done any tailoring up to two and a half years ago and the costume is so specific there are no standard cuts available..she did PRETTY well. ;) Well- she IS talented, and bored at school, and always looking for interesting stuff to do on the side. That way, we are a perfect match. I call her "gothic cotton candy"- which is totally her style. :)
I told her about the upcoming psychologist's expertise/testimonial on my mental health, and she had a good laugh. Like most of my friends when they heard the story. She told me about the two teenage girls she looks after (a troublesome two), and that one of them suffers from manic depression (a disease many, including my father from age 4, have tried to linke me up to. Fancy thing to do by a person who has physically and mentally abused you, but that is another story..and a classic strategy to get rid of a "mistake" if you're a doctor.).
She then said that she couldn't and wouldn't let me sleep over for days if I had any of the signs of that disease..and she has known for quite some time now. :) Manic depression..substance abuse, self-mutilation, promiscuous sex. Try to find any of those in my blood, on my skin, and in my life.
Sorry, guys, but I guess you will have to keep on searching. All I AM is being tired, and seriously, seriously exhausted. And very angry from time to time- usually after I had managed to regain my energies a bit. Oh, and I talk a lot faster when I have had too much coffee (I am an HSP not watching my food intake properly...://). :D..Rainer von Leoprechting ( I did an Interview with him for this blog last year while I was homeless and had to do SOMETHING to stay busy and mentally sane) said when I had forwarded the link to the BDZ blogpost to him.."Well, it is a shame that this colleague obviously has no knowledge about trauma or the like..". Which says it all, really.
Good to know there are quite a lot of people now recognizing my talent, and my spirit these days. Which helps. Here are the butterflies, and a snapshot of the suit as it is now- I am still struggling with the stencil cutouts. :)
